Helping children develop resilience
By: Gill Naeser (ECD EXPERT)
Children are sensitive to the moods of the adults around them. Often the adults avoid discussing the reason for their own moods with children. Children are aware that the adult is anxious. This may lead to anxiety in the children which may show up as sadness or they could be angry or scared. These feelings are confusing for children and this could be viewed as a crisis for the child. Supporting a child in a time of dealing with a strong emotion such as sadness helps to develop the life-long capacity of being resilient.
When a child is feeling sad, their behaviour may change, they may need a lot of attention or not want to play with other children. The child needs to know that you care for them and that you understand that they may be feeling sad. The child also needs to know that it’s okay to feel the way they are feeling. The child needs to be given an opportunity to talk about what they are feeling. When the child does share their feelings, it is important for the adult to be an active listener by focusing on letting the child talk and letting them know you understand how they are feeling, without giving advice or trying to change the feelings. If the child finds it hard to talk things out, let them show you in another way by letting them sing, draw, act, write, or play it out. Once the child has described the feeling, ask them what they think may make them feel better. Let the child know that you have faith in them and that they are able to face what is making them feel sad, tell them “I know, you can do it and I am here to help you”.
Once the child has shared their feelings and the possible solution, redirect their attention, do not let the child dwell on their feelings. Before doing activity, check if the child needs to wash their face and if they need something to eat.
Activities could be:
- singing and dancing
- playing with sand, water or clay
- playing an outside game such as going for a walk, a run or playing with a ball
- play the child’s favourite play activity with them such as dressing up, a car game, building blocks
- reading a favourite story.
Johan Kotze : Fun activity in the link: https://soundcloud.com/healthyhappyhearts/program-3-activity-3-frog-worm
Gill Naeser has been in the education, training and development sector for more than 30 years. She has a Pre-primary Teachers Diploma and a Postgraduate Degree in Education and Psychology. Gill is an expert in the field of Early Childhood Development while also being involved in a number of ECD projects including programmes which are working with vulnerable children in Sub Saharan Africa. Gill works closely with NGO’s, The Department of Education, The Department of Social Development, donors and training providers. Gill does specialist training and helps to scope projects as well as conduct programme evaluations. She has presented a number of papers at conferences. In her spare time Gill is involved in the Scouting Association of South Africa and her local environmental group, G.E.E.S.E.
